iMidnight Escapades
by Texasgirl2014
Summary: "You're where!" Carly screeched.    Freddie sighed again. He was tired, he had a headache, he was frustrated and, "We're in jail. Sam tried calling her mom, but it turns out her mom got arrested recently too, and calling my mom is not an option."
1. Chapter 1

**Disclaimer: Sadly, I don't own iCarly**

**iMidnight Escapades**

**Chapter 1**

"You're where?" Carly screeched.

Freddie sighed again. He was tired, he had a headache, he was frustrated and, "We're in jail. Sam tried calling her mom, but it turns out her mom got arrested recently too, and calling my mom is not an option, so-" 

"You guys want me to bail you out of jail." Carly finished for him. 

"Yeah pretty much. And could you get here kinda fast? Sam hasn't eaten is three hours and I'm pretty sure she's about to beat down one of the guards for his basket of ribs. Oh my God! She just-" Freddie's voice was cut off by the sound of a loud thud. It sounded almost like a human body hitting the ground. Carly shuddered at the fact that she knew what that sounded like.

When she realized Freddie had not continued speaking, Carly panicked. "Freddie? What's happening? What did Sam do? Is somebody hurt? What is going o-" 

But Carly was cut off by the sound of the operator's voice saying, "We're sorry, your phone call has been disconnected." 

The line went dead and Carly groaned. Freddie hadn't even gotten to tell her which jail they were in. She still couldn't believe Sam had managed to get Freddie into this much trouble. No, actually, she could. Just as she was about to try calling every jail within the Seattle vicinity, Mrs. Benson burst through the door. 

Carly was generally well-liked by most adults. She had an innocent look about her, the kind that said "I-get-straight-A's-and-I-don't-like-to-break-the-rules." But with this particular woman (who just happened to be not completely there, if you catch my drift), it did absolutely nothing for Carly. So when Mrs. Benson burst through the door, eyes blazing, with a syringe in hand and shouting, Carly understandably shrank backwards towards the counter. 

"FREDDIE! YOU FORGOT TO TAKE YOUR WEEKLY INJECTIONS THIS MORNING! Oh Carly, I didn't see you there!" Mrs. Benson spoke with all the kindness of a viper. 

"_Apparently_," thought Carly wryly, "_She still blames me for that stupid taco truck incident_." 

"Where is my Fredward? And that juvenile delinquent girl you always seem to be with isn't here either." Mrs. Benson spoke, her eyes narrowing, "Have they finally come to their senses and realized what a horrible friend you are for letting my Fredward get hit by that taco truck?" 

Carly's eyes widened. She had to think quickly or all hell would break loose. All she had to do was channel her inner Sam and everything would be fine. But Carly was known to be a terrible liar. She had felt so guilty when Sam had changed her grade from a B to an A on that History paper. She didn't know if she could go through that again. "_No_," She tried to rally herself, "_I have to do this or else Freddie's mom will lock him in their apartment until he dies_." She paused slightly. "_I have really got to stop watching Snapped_." 

What Carly didn't know was that that was an actual possibility. Mrs. Benson constantly feared that Freddie would leave her and had once told him, "If you ever started acting out like that Puckett child, I will never let you out of our apartment…ever." That was why Freddie knew that calling his mom was definitely not an option. 

"Uhh…" Carly trailed off nervously. 

Freddie marveled at how much damage Sam was able to do in such a short amount of time. Then again, only Sam could manage to tie a jail guard's shoes together without him noticing and then snatch the ribs out of the air when he toppled over. Under different circumstances Freddie probably would've laughed at Sam's antics, but they were in jail. Freddie groaned, when he realized the phone had gone dead and sorrowfully hung up, hoping that Carly would soon reach them. Then he frowned and turned to glare at the blonde-headed demon that was happily munching on ribs in the holding cell across from him. 

"Sam, do you have anything you'd like to say to me?" 

One of her eyebrows quirked upwards as if to say you-had-better-have-something-interesting-to-say-or-I-will-beat-you-down and paused in her decimation of ribs. 

"You're welcome," she finally drawled. 

Freddie spluttered his jaw dropping and openly stared at what he believed to be the source of all his frustrations. 

"Oh come on, Benson. Don't deny that you had just as much fun as I did, if not more. I seem to remember you coming up with some of your own schemes as well," the girl in question smirked back at him. 

The edges of Freddie's mouth seemed to be twitching upwards and Sam knew she had won the argument. This had not been the first time Freddie and Sam had gone on wild escapades. They were actually quite frequent; this was just the first time they had gotten caught. 

Freddie thought back to how all of this insanity had actually started. In the middle of their sophomore year, Freddie had deduced that Sam had insomnia. This was because she was constantly calling him in the middle of the night because she "was bored and wanted to annoy an easy target", or so she told him. He hadn't really minded, though. He was usually up pretty late studying because during the day they had iCarly things to do and when he got home his mom always made him go through 'cleansing rituals'. Freddie shuddered at the mere thought of the torture his mom insisted on putting him through. Finally it came to the point where Sam started breaking into his apartment at odd hours of the night claiming she 'needed some entertainment and he was going to give it to her'. He marveled at Sam's ability to make everything sound dirty and shook his head as if to cleanse his brain from the thought path it was beginning to travel down. They had started out doing small things, and eventually Freddie began looking forward to their nightly escapades. So what if his grades dropped a few points and he was sleeping in some of his classes? He was finally having some _fun_.

**To be continued…**


	2. Chapter 2

**iMidnight Escapades**

**Chapter 2: First Escapade, but not really**

"_I'm a Barbie girl, in a Barbie world. Life is plastic, it's fantastic!"_

Freddie groaned; Sam had changed his ring tone _again_. Thank God he wasn't in public. He tore his eyes open and was unsurprised to feel exhausted when he saw that the clock next to his bed read 4:00 in the morning.

"_You can brush my hair. Undress me everywheeeeereee!"_

He growled slightly, made a mental note to change Sam's ring tone to this song for revenge and reached blindly for his phone. By the time he found his phone it had stopped going off…only to start back up again.

"_I'm a Barbie girl_-"

"Sam why are you calling me at four in the morning?"

"Oh good you're up."

"Well I am now. Honestly Sam, do you have any respect for-"

"Cut the chiz Benson, I'm bored so open the window to the fire escape."

"WHAT? Why are you on my fire escape at four in the morning?"

"Not so loud! You might wake up the psycho!"

"Hey! That's my mom you're talking about!"

"Well duh, who'd you think I was talking about Frednerd?"

"Ugh, I don't need this. I'm going back to sleep."

"Benson I swear if you hang up on-"

He hung up on her. Then he closed his eyes and went back to sleep. Well, he _thought _he was going to go back to sleep. He was wrong.

_CRASH!_

Freddie jumped out of bed and grabbed the baseball bat by his door. Somebody had broken into his house and somebody was about to go _down_.

"_Sam's rubbing off on me too much_," he thought to himself as he slowly opened the door, poised to swing.

"Wow Benson, nice Galaxy Wars boxers."

He nearly screamed. Sam's voice was not something he had expected to hear and the fact that he was in nothing but boxers didn't help anything. He really should have known it would be Sam, she had said not to hang up on her.

"Did you just break the window that leads to my fire escape?"

"Yup."

"And did you disable the fire alarm first?"

BEEP BEEP BEEP

"I'll take that as a no then. Hurry up and hide in my bathroom!"

"I didn't know there were fire alarms installed in fire escape windows."

"There's usually not, but my mom's paranoid. Hurry up before she comes in here!"

"Fine but you owe me a ham."

"What? Why? You're the one that broke-"

"FREDDIE! FREDWARD WHERE ARE YOU?" Mrs. Benson shouted across the living room.

"Get in the bathroom and I'll buy you smoothies for a month! Just go! _Now_!" he hissed at her.

So Sam took the opportune moment to run into his bathroom and close the door.

"FREDWARD! Fredward, we have to get out of the apartment! The alarm is going off!" Mrs.

Benson yelled as she dragged him by the arm towards the door.

"Mom! I don't have any clothes on! Wait, I can't go outside looking like this!"

"Freddie! What have I told you about sleeping in only boxers? We'll just have to do extra cleansing rituals when we get back! You're in danger, the alarm is going off."

Freddie was _not_ in a good mood, scratch that, he was in a terrible mood. He was currently standing in the middle of the Bushwell Plaza lobby in only his boxers with at least a dozen other people. And all of them were giving him odd looks.

"Freddie…?" Carly's voice seemed to trail off as she fully took in all of the ahem, scenery.

"Hey Carls. Nice night huh?" He spoke nervously, fidgeting where he stood.

"Why did the alarm in your apartment go off? And why are you only in boxers?"

"Well it's-"

"WHY DON'T YOU HAVE ANY PANTS ON?" Lewburt shouted from the desk.

"My mom made me-"

"PUT SOME PANTS ON."

"I don't have any pants with me."

"GO FIND SOME."

"How am I supposed to find-"

"PUT SOME PANTS ON."

"I DON'T HAVE ANY FREAKING PANTS! SO LEAVE ME ALONE!" Freddie finally screamed back.

Needless to say, Lewburt shrunk back a little bit and went back to harassing a little kid who couldn't find his parents. Normally, Lewburt wouldn't have given Fredward Benson a second glance. But tonight, he looked slightly crazed. His eyes were blood-shot from lack of sleep, his hair was a floppy mess, his chest was heaving with repressed anger and adrenaline (He had never raised his voice at an adult before. He could just hear Sam telling that maybe he was finally growing up.), and he was actually starting to look slightly buff. So Lewburt backed off and decided to go for an easier target.

Just as Freddie turned away from Lewburt, he developed another problem. At the insistence of his deranged mother, the police were about to search the apartment. Sam was in the apartment. In his bathroom. And he couldn't reach her to tell her to get the heck out of there. He was _so_ dead. Freddie was nearly in tears when he heard what sounded like music to his ears.

"What goes on peoples," a voice drawled out behind him.

"SAM!" Freddie screamed, earning him even stranger looks from everyone in the vicinity.

"What are you doing here at four in the morning Sam?" Carly asked, giving Freddie a bemused look.

"What, no excited greeting like Freddie?" Sam smirked.

At first, Freddie was going to blurt out the whole story to Carly. But then he realized how that would sound. Sam coming into his room at four in the morning, with him in only boxers and then hiding her from his mother while somewhere along the lines a window got smashed. He was _really_ looking forward to the lecture Carly would give Sam. But he saw the look in Sam's eyes and decided maybe he wanted to know why she was here this early in the morning too.

"Yeah Sam, what are you doing here?"

"I was in the neighborhood, decided to drop by when I saw a police car headed in this direction."

It wasn't a total lie. She knew the cop car was coming in this direction because she was running from it. Freddie's apartment was just closer than Carly's and she hadn't expected the nub to refuse her.

"What were you doing in the streets at this hour Sam?" Carly spoke in a concerned tone.

"Don't get your pants in a twist Carls, I was just lookin' for some fun."

"And by fun you mean not legal right?" Spoke Freddie with a smirk. He wanted Sam to get in trouble.

"You have no proof and I don't have to answer any questions. I plead the fourth."

"Fifth." Carly supplied for her.

"Right, the fifth. That's what I said."

"Don't help her Carly! She has to answer for what she's done!" Freddie exclaimed, annoyed.

"Answer for what exactly Freddie? She hasn't done anything from what we've seen."

And he was about to spill yet again. But he saw Sam mouthing threats of torture so he kept his mouth shut.

"Nothing I guess." He answered miserably.

As he lay down in his bed finally, he was thankful it was all over. Little did he know it was only the beginning. Oh, and he was going to fail his Chemistry test in first period tomorrow.


	3. Chapter 3

**iMidnight Escapades**

**Chapter 3**

Freddie was bewildered. Sam had broken into his apartment at four in the morning with the only explanation being that she was bored and hadn't said one word about it since. It had been three weeks and he decided that maybe he should forget about it but then Sam shoved him up against the lockers at the end of school and somehow managed to slip a note into his front jeans pocket. He felt violated. She'd slipped a note down there and he hadn't even noticed. He was even more surprised to see what the note said; it definitely wasn't something someone expected to see on a note from their torturer.

_Dorkwad,_

_Be awake at 2 a.m. I'm coming over and you'd better unlock the window this time or I'll smash it again._

_P.S. –tell anyone and you die_

"_Because it's my dream to have a girl sneak into my apartment at night. Wait….dangit Sam! You ruin all my fantasies!"_ Freddie thought to himself as he trudged home from school, waiting for what he believed to be his doom.

Freddie was beyond frustrated; it was 2:30 and Sam still hadn't showed up. He was exhausted and just wanted to sleep but he couldn't risk Sam breaking the window again. Just as he was about to abandon the idea of Sam ever coming, he heard a tapping and turned to see Sam outside on his fire escape. She looked…out of breath?

"Open up Benson." Came the muffled voice of Sam through the window.

He blearily opened his eyes and opened the window.

"You're late."

"Whatever just let me in."

"No."

"Excuse you?"

"I want an explanation first. You have no right to just show up at my apartment at 2:30 in the morning and just expect me to let you in!"

"You stayed awake didn't you?"

"Because I didn't want you to smash my window again!"

"And technically it's your mother's apartment, not yours. Seriously Fredwad, just move so I can come in."

"Why do you want to come in anyways? Don't you hate me? Why can't you just go to Carly's?"

Just then he heard sirens coming towards Bushwell Plaza. He smirked and his eyes took on a devilish look.

"So that's why, huh? I'm your hide-out. Well news flash Sam, I don't have to do what you say. I think I'll just let you get arrested Puckett."

"No you won't."

"And why not? Since when-"

"You have no choice but to let me in and hide me while the cops pass. If they see you up here, they'll assume you're helping me hide."

"No, I'll just tell them the truth."

"They won't believe you. They watch iCarly. They know we're…co-workers. It'll look like you're trying to help me. Even if you do tell them the truth, they won't believe you."

He groaned. This girl really did know how to make him miserable.

"Fine, just don't be loud."

"Freeeeeeeeeeedwierd. Fredwierd! _Fredwad_! Get UP!"

"Hynggg," Was the only response she got.

"Fine then, but remember Freddork, you asked for it."

Had Freddie known what was about to happen to him, he would have never fallen asleep. But he didn't, so he fell asleep. So Sam took her index finger, stuck it in her mouth and then…stuck it in Freddie's ear. The affect was nearly instantaneous. Freddie awoke with a muffled scream (Sam had made sure to cover his face with blankets and pillows so he wouldn't wake up his insane mother) and flailed his limbs around until he fell off of his bed.

"The cops are gone."

"Good, that means you can leave."

"I think not."

"What? Do you want food or something? Just raid my kitchen."

"I already did and dude your food is gross…except for that fat cakes stash I found."

"Sam! I was saving th-"

"Build a bridge and get over it Freddison. Now get up and put your clothes on, we're goin' out."

He looked down at himself and his face turned a ghostly shade of white. What had happened to his clothes? He was sure that he had had them on before he went to sleep. Now all he had on was his boxers. Did he even want to know? No, he decided, he didn't. Suddenly his alarm clock went off.

"Dude, why's your alarm clock going off at three in the morning?"

"I was gonna wake up to study."

"Are you kidding?"

"No, Sam. Unlike you, some people are actually planning on going to college and in order to do that, I have to get good grades! Forget it, it's not something you could even begin to comprehend." He spoke in a huff.

Under normal circumstances, Freddie would've had three broken ribs and a fractured wrist by now. But Sam could tell something was off, so she decided to delay the beat down.

"Calm down Fredwad. What up?"

"Nothing," He responded miserably.

"Sure it's nothing. Alright c'mon."

"C'mon where? I'm not going anywhere! It's a school night!"

"I could throw you down the fire escape if you prefer…" she trailed off.

He got up.

"Okay, the first rule of doing illegal stuffs is _never_ get caught."

"Haven't you broken that rule like five times already?"

"Second rule is _never_ squeal to the cops."

"Or what? You'll beat me up? You can't do that in jail."

She turned on him, "Can't I though? Mama has ways. And if that doesn't work, I'll just make a call to my Uncle Carmine."

"Where are we going?"

"Tagging."

"I never agreed to this!"

"I never asked you to agree."

"You didn't answer my question. Where are we going?"

"We're here." She breathed out.

They had arrived in a rather seedy part of town. He wasn't going to admit it, but Freddie was scared. They had passed three drunk hobos, a guy wielding a machete like he was Jack Sparrow, and people running from a store they had just robbed. Where the heck had Sam taken him?

"Where exactly is here. I don't know the way back from here."

"Then don't get separated from me you wuss. Here," She spoke, handing him a can of spray paint.

"And what exactly am I supposed to do with this?"

"Art. C'mon Fredenstien, you must have _some_ artistic ability."

"Ooh, using big words are we?"

"Shut up before I spray this in your eyes."

"RUN FASTER FREDDORK! THEY'RE RIGHT BEHIND US!"

"I'm *pant* trying *pant* but I'm *pant* out of *pant* shape!"

"Well you're about to be out of shape with a criminal record if you don't hurry the chizz up!"

And with that, she disappeared before his very eyes.

"Sam? Where-"

Before he could finish the sentence, she yanked his arm into an ally and told him to shut up.

"This is a dead end. We're so gonna get caught. Oh my God, I'm going to have a criminal record. I won't get into Harvard. I'll be stuck living with my mother for the rest of my-" his mumblings were cut off by a swift kick to the back of his knee and he fell to the ground in pain.

"Shut _up_ Benson! It's not a dead end; now follow me! And be quiet or I'll let the cops have you!"

She led him to the end of the alley where an old lady was standing with an open door to her apartment.

"Rule number three: _always_ know where your safe house is."


	4. Chapter 4

**iMidnight Escapades**

**Chapter 4**

"Where are we going?"

"Do you realize that you ask that question every night and I never answer until we reach our destination? For a tech wiz, you're being very slow."

"Whatever."

"What an intelligent come back Freddork. Lack of sleep getting to you, pansy?"

"If you must know, yes, I do have a lack of sleep."

"Hey, you were the one that suggested this in the first place. So don't go blaming me when you fail our History test tomorrow."

"We have a history test tomorrow? Since WHEN? Oh my God, I'm going to fail that. Sam, let's go back. I have to study! C'mon, where are we? I _have_ to go back and study."

"Woah Fredwad, calm down. It's one test! You didn't know about it because you've been asleep in that class for the past week. Carly thinks you're like sick or something. Besides, I'm sure you'll be able to make it up with all the extra credit assignments you do. I'm not backing out of this and neither are you. You came up with this idea, so suck it up and deal."

"Did you just say something nice to me? I think I'm going into shock."

"Shut up Fredwierd."

"Hey wait, Carly thinks I'm sick? What'd you say to her?"

"Nothing. I told her I didn't know anything about it and that it was probably some side-effect of your mom's crazyness."

"What'd she say to that?"

"Why are you so interested?"

"Because my two best friends were talking about me behind my back!"

"I'm your best friend?"

"I will grudgingly admit that yes, sometimes you can be the tiniest bit friendly. Why can't we just tell Carly?"

"Because Carly couldn't lie to save the entire human population. She'd feel all 'guilty' and have to go tell your mom like she did with the fencing thing. If she told your mom, you'd never be let out of that apartment…ever."

"Oh my God."

"What?"

"You actually care about me!"

"I do not."

"Yes, you do."

"I do _not_, I was only looking out for our fans. If you couldn't leave, then we'd have to cancel iCarly and then we'd disappoint our fans."

"_Suuuure_, you're doing this for iCarly."

"I am, now shut up and hand me the screw driver. We're here."

"Don't we need to put on gloves in case they check for prints?"

"Nah, lots of people touch street signs."

"Why would they do that?"

"Does it look like I care? Here, hold the sign while I get down from the ladder."

"Why this specific sign though?"

The street sign read: _Wart Lane_

"I thought it seemed fitting. We _are_ nailing it to Lewbert's desk."

_I'm a Barbie girl, in a Barbie the woooooooooooooooorld._

"Really Sam? Again?"

"I think it suits you! Who's calling you at this hour anyways?"

"It's Carly."

_Life in plastic, it's fantastic! You can brush my hair, undress me everywheeeeeeeeere!_

"Don't mention anything about me, got it?"

"Why?"

"Just don't; now pick up the phone before she tries your apartment."

"Carly? What's up?"

"Have you seen Sam?"

"No, why?"

"She said she was spending the night tonight. She was here at first but I woke up and now she's gone!"

Freddie covered the phone with his hand and turned to Sam, "Why the heck are we doing this when you're supposed to be at Carly's? She's freaking out!"

"She's never woken up before! I didn't think she would!"

"Carly? Yeah, I haven't seen her. Maybe she went for a walk or went to go get some food."

"Sam's lazy, she wouldn't go for a walk! And we're stocked up on food here!"

"Look, Carly you have to calm down. I'm sure she'll turn up sooner or later. In fact, I have a feeling she'll show up very soon," he said with a glare sent in Sam's direction.

"Okay. Can I come over? I'm scared."

_Oh crap._

"Uh, I think my mom's getting up. I have to go. She'll kill you if you come over! Bye!"

"Wow Benson, I didn't know you had it in you."

"SAM! Why are we doing this tonight? You should be at Carly's! If she finds out, we're doomed!"

"I picked tonight because tonight is the only night that Lewbert isn't going to sleep in the lobby this month. And no, only you'll be doomed."

"You have that memorized? Y'know if you applied yourself to school like you did to crime, you'd probably be a really good student…and you're wrong, we'll both be doomed. Remember how we agreed no more secrets? Well this is a secret and Carly won't be happy with either of us if she finds out before we tell her."

"First of all, the only reason I go to school is because if I didn't my mom would be permanently thrown in jail and I'd end up in a foster home. Second of all, who said we were ever going to tell Carly? And third of all, lighten up Benson! I'll just make something up to tell Carly."

"Fine, but eventually she's going to find out. She always does. When that happens, you're taking the blame."

"Whatever Freddison, just hand me the sign and the drill."

Sam quietly opened the door and stepped inside, making sure she didn't make a lot of noise. "_Be asleep, be asleep, be asleep_." Sam thought to herself as she turned around and closed the door.

"Where in the world have you been Sam?"

"I was-"

"Don't lie to me Sam! You had me really freaked out! You could've been hurt and I couldn't reach you!"

"Woah Carls, what are you, my mother?"

"Sam it's not funny! I woke up in the middle of the night and you were just suddenly gone. Do you know how many drunks there are out on the streets at this hour?"

Sam sighed, "No, I don't."

"Well there's a lot!"

"Chill Carls, I know how to defend myself!"

"Could you really defend yourself against a group of drunks? Really Sam?"

"Carly, calm down. I knew where I was and I was aware of my surroundings. Besides do you really think I'd -"

Sam stopped suddenly. She'd almost revealed their secret.

"Do I really think you'd what?" Carly asked suspiciously.

"Do you really think I'd leave your apartment for long? I practically live here." Sam spoke with a laugh. She was improving of course and she hoped she sounded convincing because honestly, she was _really_ tired.

"I guess not." Carly didn't sound all that convinced, but she let the subject drop.

"Where's Sam? It's already third period. Did she come back last night?"

"Yeah she came back last night. She had breakfast at my place and then disappeared again! I honestly have no idea what goes on in her mind sometimes!" Carly huffed out.

"What goes on peoples?" Sam drawled out lazily.

"Way to be late Puckett."

"Shut it Freddison."

"Where did you go after breakfast? You like disappeared as soon as we walked out of Bushwell Plaza!"

"I was running from cops."

"What did you do?" asked Freddie.

"Nothing, it's just instinctive."

"So any time you see a cop, you run?"

"No, any time I see them on a vehicle."

"Why?"

"I can just beat them up if they're not in one."

"SAM! We don't hit cops!" Carly shrieked.

"Take a chill pill Carls, it's only happened twice."

"Oh my God."

"How long were you in jail for?" asked Freddie.

"I wasn't. Apparently they both got concussions and didn't remember what happened."

"Oh my God."

"Stop saying that Carly!"

"I'm sorry, it's just….OH MY GOD SAM!"

"Lewbert got arrested this morning." Sam said casually, changing the subject.

"What? Why? Is that why you ran from cops?" asked Freddie.

"Yep, apparently he stole a street sign and then drilled it into his desk!"

"Wow, why would he display the evidence?"

"I don't know but Spencer recorded the whole thing!"

"So they just arrested him on the spot?"

"Yup, they took the sign too. Apparently Lewbert doesn't have an alibi about where he was so they're gonna run the sign for prints."

_Well crap._

**A/N: Thank you to ALL of my reviewers! I don't know if there really is a Wart Lane but if there is I don't own it! I'm leaving for about a week and a half and I won't be able to update but as soon as I come back I will! What do you think so far?**


	5. Chapter 5

**iMidnight Escapades**

**Chapter 5**

"Wake up Benson." Sam whispered into Freddie's ear.

Much to Sam's chagrin, he awoke with a frightened look gracing his face. She could tell his heart was thrumming against his chest, aching with the fear of the unexpected.

"How the chiz did you break into my apartment?" He half-whispered when he finally realized what was going on.

"I disabled the alarm and pried open the window."

Freddie rolled his eyes when he noticed the smug look on her face that told him that she was proud of herself, "Why didn't you call me?"

"Wasn't in the mood to be patient."

"Right, because you're patient when I'm on the phone with you."

"And don't you forget it."

"Okay, so what are we going to do?"

"What?"

"They're running prints on the sign."

"Oh that."

"Yeah, _that_. Sam, we could be about to get arrested!"

"And? We're not 18 yet." She noticed he didn't seem all that concerned, when he followed her out of the fire escape.

"That's not the point! Do you have any idea how much trouble we'd be in if we got arrested?"

"Nah, my mom wouldn't care. Only you'd be in trouble."

"Wrong again Puckett."

"As much fun as I'm sure you're having, deluding yourself into thinking I'm wrong, I think this conversation would be best continued outside. Away from psychos."

"Point taken, so where are we going?"

"Do you ever learn?"

* * *

><p>"So how am I wrong?"<p>

"Where are we going?"

"It's rude to answer a question with a question."

"And you're the epitome of being polite."

"Precisely."

Freddie sighed, this was getting annoying. He didn't know where he was, it was cold and Sam was insisting on starting an argument.

"We'd both be in trouble with Carly."

"What's she gonna do, hit me? Yeah right."

"I'm being serious."

"So am I."

"Think about how angry she'd be."

"I've dealt with an angry Carly more than you have; I think I can handle myself."

"And think about how disappointed she'd be."

Sam winced and glared. Freddie knew he should probably start running in the opposite direction from Sam, he'd struck a nerve, but she needed to hear this. Or so he thought.

"Look Benson. I'm not doing this because I have to. I'm doing this for you. So you'd better shut your trap before I shut it FOR YOU!" She whirled on him.

"What do you mean, you're doing this for me? I could be about to end up in jail!"

She laughed, but it was a harsh, strangled laugh, "Freddison, you were going to have like, an aneurism or something if you didn't start to have some sort of fun in your life."

"iCarly is fun!"

"Too routine. You get used to it and the rush isn't as big."

"I'm serious, if you applied this kind of thought to school-"

"Screw school Benson. This has nothing to do with school!"

"Then what does it have to do with?"

"Nothing. Everything. Life. I don't know! What I _do_ know is that school isn't all that's out there. There's anything and everything at our fingertips and we're wasting time on stupid freaking school! Honestly, it's not the end of the world if you don't do well in school! Relax Fredwierd, loosen up. Life's much less suckish if you do."

"What the hell is that supposed to mean?"

"C'mon Benson. You know as well as I do that I'm smarter than I let on. I'm trying to show you something but if you can't figure it out then you're obviously not very smart. We're here."

Freddie was quiet for a moment, drinking in their surroundings, a thoughtful look crossing his face.

"I get it, you're trying to show me there's more to life. I already knew that, you didn't have to show me that."

"You knew it, but you never would've acted on it." She spoke sharply, he could tell she was growing very agitated.

"Why do you care so much Puckett?" Apparently he had a death wish because he pushed the topic on further.

A look Freddie couldn't decipher crossed her face and she paused for a moment, "Who the heck knows? Now what do you see?"

"All I see is a broken down car in a creepy alleyway. And I don't see any spray paint cans or power tools."

The alley was pretty dingy. Curse words decorated every inch of wall and there was trash strewn all over the place. Freddie was pretty sure a large chunk of trash had just moved and he did _not_ want to find out what was underneath it. The lighting was very dim and it was a cloudy night, which he assumed was perfect for whatever Sam had planned.

"Wrong."

"What? That's all that's there!" He was growing more jittery by the second, the trash was inching closer to them and if possible it seemed to have gotten darker.

"That car is _not _broken to how to hot-wire a car! Lesson one…"

* * *

><p>"Alright, first we gotta check out the tunes they've got."<p>

"Sam, this is a bad idea. This is a really, really, _really _bad idea. This is theft. This is theft of a vehicle. We are currently leaving prints all over another crime scene."

"For once in your life, could you not be a worry wart? All we're doing is going for a little joy ride and then the car's going back. Nobody'll ever know!"

With that parting statement, she shoved her foot on top of his, revving the engine and shooting them down the dark alley.

* * *

><p>"Go faster! I swear, you're slower than my Grandma!"<p>

"She's in jail for all her unpaid speeding tickets."

"Your point?"

He went faster.

"Whatever," he spoke, rolling his eyes, "So where exactly are we planning on going?"

Just as she was about to speak, a siren went off. It was right behind them. Freddie was sure that his life was over. His mother would never let him out of her sight. He would die in that apartment.

"Oh God, oh God, oh God, oh God."

"Benson, shut up. We're fine. Speed up and pull into that junkyard."

"_This is the police. Pull over."_

"Go faster. Don't listen to them."

He almost laughed; it was like having an angel on one shoulder and the devil on the other. Wow, he really did have a lack of sleep. He sped into the junkyard.

"Now what?"

"Shut off the lights and find a row of cars. Once you get there park the car and shut it off. Be really quiet, don't make any noises."

"We're gonna get caught."

"No we're not I've got a plan."

* * *

><p>"<em>This is the police, come out into the open.<em>"

"Freddison, this way." Sam called out, pointing in the direction of an oddly familiar looking motorcycle.

"How is a motorcycle going to help us?" He asked in a panicky tone. The cops were starting to swarm the junkyard and any minute now, they would be found. He almost couldn't hear over the sound of adrenaline rushing through his veins.

"The cops can't follow you on a motorcycle because it's too dangerous."

"How do you know this stuff? You know what…I don't even want to know. Hey isn't this Spencer's?" Now he knew why it looked familiar.

"….maybe." She answered, almost sheepishly.

"Does he know you stole it?" He glared, accusingly.

"I borrowed it"

"Without asking!"

"So? I'm returning it! It's not like he'd care anyways.

"I think he'd care if they took down the plates and he gets arrested for something he didn't commit."

"Relax, I switched the plates!"

"So you knew cops would come after us?"

"No, but it's better to be safe than sorry."

"Well thank God your mom taught you SOMETHING."

"Actually that was my parole officer."

"Dear God…"

"Oh quit complaining!"

"I'm not complaining, I'm concerned! How are you not in jail for the rest of your life already?"

"I haven't gotten caught for anything serious."

"What, is it just a matter of time before you rob a bank?"

"The plans are actually in the making."

"I was kidding."

"I know you were, but I'm not." she said with a devious smile.

He hadn't even noticed they'd made it out of the junkyard. He wouldn't have even registered that they were back in the Bushwell Plaza garage if it hadn't been for a _very_ upset looking Spencer.

* * *

><p><strong>AN:** *tries to hide from angry mob* I'm soooooo sorry! School started again, which means AP and cross country and that took away almost ALL of my time! It shouldn't be that long again before the next update.


	6. Chapter 6

**iMidnight Escapades**

**Chapter 6**

"Guys, where's my motorcycle?" Spencer asked. His voice was quiet and slow.

They had parked the motorcycle and gotten off of it, all the while Spencer had stood there calmly but looking upset. Now Freddie was confused and despite himself, he reached out for Sam. Sam of course was in full criminal mode so she shrugged his hand away and turned to glare at him.

"What do you mean Spence?" Sam asked curiously, trying to quickly analyze the situation so she could get into as little trouble as possible.

"Wha…" Spencer trailed off, his eyes looking glazed over.

A light bulb seemed to have gone off in Sam's head as she turned toward Freddie.

"He's sleepwalking," she whispered, "We can play it off like a Wake Up Spencer!" She whispered towards him.

Freddie nodded his head in realization and he inched away from the garage.

"Hey Spencer, where'd your motorcycle go?"

"It's right here!" Spencer spoke, agitatedly.

"No it's not." Said Sam.

"You guys just got off of it!" Spencer nearly yelled.

"No we didn't, we just came back from school." Spoke Freddie, grinning.

"Nu-uh! It's dark outside!" The childish man shot right back.

"You have tinted contacts in, it only _looks_ dark but it's really not."

"But-!" Spencer was quickly cut off by Freddie.

"Yeah uhm, Sam and I are gonna go find Carly! Bye!" Freddie spoke quickly, dragging Sam away.

"What was that for Freddork? It was just getting fun!"

"He was starting to wake up and I seriously doubt you would have enjoyed explaining our situation!"

Her only response was a glare.

* * *

><p><em>THUD<em>!

Freddie's head hit the desk with a bang and suddenly Mr. Buttburn stopped talking. The entire class went dead silent and stared at the currently asleep and drooling Freddie.

"Sam no, I don' wanna spray paint a unicorn. Iss too pretty." He mumbled in his sleep.

Under any other circumstances, Sam would broken at least one of his arms by now for mentioning her in one of his dreams but Sam knew why he was so tired and so she laughed. The entire class, having waited with baited breath (including the teacher) for Sam to kill Freddie in his sleep (which really wouldn't have come as a surprise to most of the inhabitants of the school) started laughing too. Nervously of course.

"No! You can't make me pay! I don't think it'll taste good. It looks gross." He mumbled agitatedly.

Carly's eyes darted between her two best friends. Freddie just talked about Sam in his dream in front of the entire class and Sam _hadn't_ killed him. What? Did the apocalypse come and she missed it or something? Was Sam sick? Had she gone deaf? Questions, questions! She was determined to get to the bottom of this.

"Uhm, somebody wake up Freddie." Mr. Buttburn spoke nervously. He hated this class. Samantha Puckett was in this class. No! It was Sam! Never call her Samantha. Not after last time….

* * *

><p>"Why'd you fall asleep in class Freddie?" Carly finally asked when they had arrived at her apartment after school. It had been nagging at her all day long but she hadn't found an opportunity to ask him. Freddie didn't just normally fall asleep in class, that was Sam!<p>

"Yeah Freddison. I didn't know you liked unicorns."

"Wh-what? I don't like unicorns!" Ignoring Carly completely, he fidgeted in the direction of Sam.

"Well you told me they were pretty." Sam spoke, laughing.

"I don't know what you're talking about!"

"Uh, hello? I asked you a question Freddie!" Carly spoke out, trying to interrupt what she knew to be a soon full-fledged fight.

"You specifically told me, and I quote, 'Sam no, I don' wanna spray paint a unicorn. Iss too pretty.'" She smirked.

Freddie's face had gone completely white when he realized he'd spoken aloud his dream. He dearly hoped he hadn't said all of it out loud. He was dreaming about riding on the motorcycle with Sam, except this time they had ridden off on a road trip and he was paying their way across the country. Now that would have _definitely_ earned him an interrogation from Carly. You don't just dream about your best friend like that, right? Freddie's face reddened.

"So what if I do? I didn't um, say anything else did I?"

Before Sam or Carly could ask him what that was supposed to mean, Spencer burst from his room screaming that he had to make sure his motorcycle was safe.

"Well I would love to embarrass you further but Mama has a date with Carly's fridge so I'll catch you guys later!"

"Not right now Sam, we're supposed to rehears for iCarly!"

But it was too late, Sam had already started eating and both brunettes knew that interrupting Sam while she was eating was definitely not a good idea if you valued your life.

* * *

><p>The following morning, while searching for his essay that he was <em>sure<em> he had printed out and had accidentally deleted from his computer, he found a note on the printer.

_Freddork, _

_Meet me at the park. _

_Tonight. 2 a.m._

_Come alone or you'll never get your essay back._

_-You Know Who_

_P.S.- tell Carly and I'll burn it_

Freddie groaned in dismay. Sam was skipping today and he wouldn't be able to get it back until tonight. _Passed the due date_. How did he know Sam was skipping? It was simple, she always skipped the 13th. Sam was superstitious about the 13th and she was convinced that going to school on that day would be _terrible_. But Freddie was pretty sure it was just an excuse to skip school.

**A/N: **I know, I know, it's a filler chapter and everybody hates those and it's short which is even worse! I'm sorry! I need ideas, anything you could think of would be nice and I'll be sure to give a shout out to you if I use your idea. Just make sure it's somewhat appropriate. I will not be changing the rating on this story.


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